Summer: Rising temperatures, rising number of summer flings that don't last come the drop of the autumn leaves, and decreasing number of relationships that make it through the summer. Ah... summer.
Inspiration for this post? Seeing friends around me finding love, losing love, and walking the misleading bridge between the first two...
Let me begin by stating the obvious: women are known to lug around their emotional turmoil differently from men.
The difference? We not only deal with it emotionally but we tend to let it fog our judgement both mentally, and worse: physically...
When we look in our mirror in the morning, all we can think is:
A) "This is what he chose to leave behind."
B) "This is why he moved on to the next" (even if she's a classier version of Snooki, who believes that tube tops and mini skirts are still considered staples in every girl's closet -- note: Yes, I said girl)
Or C) universally, we all think: "He chose not to stick around with this version of me. Everything I see in the mirror is a reminder of my chapter with him. I need a change, I've been neglecting myself, subduing my shine."
Whatever the thought, women tend to take two routes: "The Extremist" and "The Victim". Two roles that can lead to horrific results if not carefully weighed.
"The Extremist":
Extremists are attention grabbers who tend to grab for the scissors or reach for the drastic hair dye faster than you can say: "impending regret".
"The Victim":
Victims believe that by physically showing their emotional turmoil by eating a crumb for breakfast, lunch, and dinner they are showing their ex loves that they are helpless without them. And maybe, if their ex lovers see their physical evidence of a desperate cry for help, they'll come back. Cut the string quartet on this attempt ladies because the success rate on this one is at a low zero. Next thing you know, you'll be spending years recovering your physical health, metabolism, and digestion having spent days, months, possibly years destabilizing your system. As ugly as it sounds, it's true. And while you're sitting around eating baby food (the only food you can somewhat digest), the sadder part is: the ex is still long gone and you just successfully, single-handedly, made yourself less marketable to the male population.
That being said, it's time to bash those blunders...
Blunder #1: Fry My Tresses
I am normally a huge supporter of Whitney Port, but I have seen this girl change her hair color more than the number of seasons in a year. Blame it on her breakup with longtime beau, Ben Nemtin perhaps, but her lightening speed color changes is screaming to the public, "I'm heartbroken, and now colorblind!!". She has repeatedly been undergoing color transformations for different, and well, horrible versions of her signature dirty blond tresses. Strawberry blond should stick to Pippy Longstockings, fictional characters only, please? With her monthly and sometimes weekly visits to the hair salon, I am surprised the poor girl's hair is not falling from her head.
Blunder #2: A Class Trade-In
Remember that scene from SATC 2, when Carrie was so set on her soon-to-not-happen wedding to Mr. Big that she proudly posed for an extensive wedding feature spread for Vogue magazine modeling the most decadent of designer wedding dresses only to face the magazine hitting news stands after her wedding flop? [insert: deep gasp for air] This would be every girl's nightmare, and it unfortunately was brought to life with Kristin Cavallari's engagement to athlete, Jay Cutler. Except for the fact that the wedding day never came. The good thing is that Cavallari's not choosing to mope at home. However, she dropped off her classy wardrobe and made a U-turn back to her old hoochy-mama wardrobe from her Laguna Beach days. Don't punish your class, punish the man's unappreciative eye for taste. Dressing in such a way will only diminish your chances at catching the eye of a more worthy man in your prospective future.
When experiencing a minor, major, or detrimental break-up, think to yourself: "How I treat myself is how I see my self-worth. I am worth it, overtime more or less, he will realize it." Regardless of the terms, continue to handle yourself with the same class and composure you always have. Why waste your time suffering the after-effects of an unappreciated relationship only to spoil your chances at starting another (possibly better) love?
Blunder #3: Loss of a Fashionable Eye (or 2)
Normally bitten by the fashion bug of good taste, Whitney has fell off the bandwagon lately and enlisted herself in the post-breakup, tastefully blind list. Velour jumpsuit... really? Even the Lady Dior handbag couldn't salvage this one. Dressing like a looney would not only make your ex feel even more justified with his decision to call it quits, it also would make other prospective suitors run for the hills. This is as honest as it gets...
"Break-Up, Don't Break-Down"
Get a Fresh Cut: Subtle, NOT Drastic
Amanda Seyfried: Post-split with her fling with someone who's too familiar with the phrase, "Baby Daddy" a.k.a. Ryan Phillipe. Rather than being spotted getting wasted at a club, Amanda kept it low-key by opting to subtly chop her long locks for a fresher look.
Kate Bosworth
Looking for Unconditional Love? Surround Yourself with the Most Loyal Creature Around: the Canine
Amanda Seyfried with her dog, Finn
Regardless of the mistakes you've done, your canine friend gives you the unconditional affection you need the most. What more could you ask for at a time of need? Doubt in loyalty is never a concern to have when it comes to a dog. If like you currently don't have a pooch of your own, borrow one! Thank goodness I am the godmother to more than just one...
Luckily I have one of my best girlfriends, Nancy's little bugger, Puffy nearby (I call him Diddy -- and am the cause for his identity crisis from an early age). How can you not fall in love with this little guy?
xoxo QBee
Photo Credits; JustJared, StartStyle, and Hillsfreak
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